TV: Death wore velvety green. Homicidal house plants, next on [i:1f457]Sick, Sad World.[/i:1f457] (Helen tries to usher Dr. House into Daria\'s room) Helen: The word malpractice must still have some meaning. House: Actually, no. You lawyers drained it of any meaning after about the gazillionth six-figure settlement for some idiot kid\'s scraped knee. Helen: (Angry) Why— House: Or maybe you\'re not familiar with that because your practice is limited to helping corporations evade taxes. So much more classy than chasing ambulances. Helen: (Angrier) I [i:1f457]never—[/i:1f457] House: Really? So your daughter\'s adapted then? Helen: (Flummoxed) I—no, she\'s my daughter— House: (looks at Jake, sleeping. Then, in a whisper:) Oh, I get it—just not [i:1f457]his[/i:1f457] daughter, right? (winks at Helen) Helen: (Furious) No, he\'s her father! Jake: (waking up) What? Who? (suddenly aghast) You mean Daria is— Helen: Jake, Daria is not— Daria: (To House) Who the hell are you, and why are you harassing my mom? House: (Pointing at Daria) Look, she\'s talking! The laryngytis must have resolved on its own. Bye! (Starts to leave, but Helen blocks his way) Jake: That\'s all it was—laryngytis? Helen: Jake, be QUIET! (To House) Dr. House, she had a [i:1f457]rash![/i:1f457] House: (glancing at Daria) Well, her skin\'s clear now. It must have resolved on its own. Bye! (Starts to leave, but Trent comes into the doorway) Trent: Um...\'cuse me. Is this Daria Morgendorffer\'s room? House: (looking askance at Trent) Dude! You think I\'m like allowed to tell you that? Trent: (noticing Helen) Oh, hey, Mrs. M. Is Daria in here? Helen: (glad to see a friendly face, but still trying to get House to look at Daria) Hello Trent, and yes she is, but this isn\'t the best time— (grabs House\'s sleeve) Doctor, if you would only— House: (distracted, sniffing the air. To Trent:) Dude, that stuff only makes you [i:1f457]think[/i:1f457] you can play better. Trent: What? Whoa— House: (grabs Trent\'s hands and looks at them) And you\'re never gonna get [i:1f457]anywhere[/i:1f457] until you at least learn to play in an open D tuning. Trent: (wounded) Hey, that\'s just cruel. It\'s not like I haven\'t been trying. House: [i:1f457]Try harder![/i:1f457] Trent: Eep! (He never says that in the series, does he?) Jake: (hearing the voice, trying to see over Helen and House\'s shoulders) Is that Trent? Hey, Trent, my man! C\'mon in! Daria: Trent? (Starts to turn red. Then starts to wheeze) Jake: Kiddo? You all right? Helen: (Turns, notices Daria struggling to breathe) Daria! Oh God! (rushes to her side) Doctor, can\'t you see she\'s— House: (pulling a syringe with epinephine from a cabinet) Jesus, it\'s as if you people never saw anaphylaxis before— (jabs her in the arm with it, and Daria\'s swelling and wheezing start to abate. Takes her chart and begins to scribble on it) I\'m going to order anoth er scratch test [i:1f457]and[/i:1f457] a RAST test for allergies, \'cause obviously your friendly Dr. Phillips missed so mething. But so what if he almost killed her? His bedside manner is much better than mine. (Pointing to Trent, who\'s been watching with alarm from the doorway) And you—stay away from her until we find out what she\'s allergic to. (Beat. Then, turning to the Morgendorffers) Maybe you should keep him away even afterward—he might say she looks [url=http://thepaperpusher.net/forum/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=9157&p=113865&hilit=beer#p113865:1f457]cool hold ing a beer or something,[/url:1f457] and who knows where that\'ll lead? [Author tips his hat to the WacoKid] (To no one in particular) I\'m now returning to my strip poker game with the candystripers, already in progress. (He goes to the door as Trent comes into the room, but stops Trent to look at his hands) You know, a guitar is tuned E-[b:1f457]A-D[/b:1f457]-G-B-E. Trent: (wide-eyed) Really? House: Would I lie to you? Especially just after saving your girlfrie nd\'s life? Trent: But she\'s not my— CUT TO: Daria\'s bed. Her back goes rigid, her eyes squeeze shut, and sh e begins shaking furiously. Helen: (shocked) Doctor, look! Jake: (furiously paging through one of his teenagers and drugs pamphlets) Gah damn it! She must be snorting Mary Sue! House: (looks over his shoulder, raises an eyebrow, and then yells out into the hallway) Call a code. (Walks over to Daria\'s bed. Smiles) Guess this isn\'t going to be such a bad day after all...'